For the first time in my life, I struggled wondering why I feel so much passion inside me-desire for a better life. Not by career or money, but by living each day how I want. Knowing that I will never truly be judged by those who want me in their lives. Knowing that wearing my emotions on my sleeves is just who I am. That in life, you can’t always be right -however, you shouldn’t fear being wrong. You can control how your own emotions transpire instead of placing them upon another. It’s a scary feeling knowing that what you say or do or write or yes, “Facebook”, is always being judged. I’m not sure how I can cope with that, especially when it comes from people I respect.
I realized today, that I may have always been that weird kid in the back of art class. I’m just not ashamed of it.
There is something I truly believe in, in the world and I want to find it. I want to give hope to others. I want to be the first to step forward. To make the jump. I can’t live this life knowing what I am capable of and yet, do nothing in return. I can not, not say no to someone. I look forward to helping if I can/when I can. I live to make someone smile. This can be a burden.
As I struggled today, with what I could do to light up the world in less than 24hrs..it was a task that I found impossible. If given a weekend, or week- I could come up with something. I had nothing but ideas that required too much time. After I got pulled over by a cop today for expired license plates, I pulled into the store. I sat here last night debating. (How ridiculous this idea was). How I am probably “missing the point”. Regardless, I grabbed the markers, and what ended up looking like a four minute job by a third grader, ended up hours, by a grown man. Double sided, I may add.
Today, I decided to walk the 8 miles to the Maumee DMV (Perrysburg was too close) carrying this sign at 7am. I am not only renewing my license plates, but I am setting out to “light up the world” and to better myself. I just can’t explain why..
So go ahead, judge me. (“Here’s my sign”..)